(This should be read first before reading Chapter 2 "The Moist Eyes")
Pranav just got out of the movie hall.... in the rush of the people coming out of the hall, no one noticed in the dark that there were tears in his eyes. For the last couple of days he was struggling with himself.... with the truth that life had shown him just a couple of days before. He wanted to be alone, always alone... may be sometimes the loneliest moments that he had, gave him the bliss he needed. He wrestled with the thoughts day and night, till either the thoughts died or till he felt asleep.
He wanted to cry, cry loud, with the scream that could be heard in each corner of the world... a scream that would wake every sleeping soul in the world... a scream... which shall tear him apart.... May be it was just in this hope that he had come to see this movie, so that in the dark, the shock that he had got some days ago will melt in tears... and it did... he was feeling better with the exodus of the tears.
The streets were all empty and he walked lonely on them ..... and with each step a drop of tear was flowing down his cheek, timing the footsteps as if giving a music. He unlocked the apartment and fell on his bed looking at the ceiling, the fan was moving slowly with a small tick sound.... the moving fan took him slowly to the moment when he saw her for the first time ..........................................
It was bus number 348 on which he was sitting on the 4th seat alone, away from the window. There came someone who said "excuse me" and he moved his leg out of the seat giving her way. He just saw a blue Salwaar Kameez rubbing against the seat and getting seated next to him.... He was conscious of the lovely perfume smell she had, he just tried to see her from the corner of his eyes... black blunt hair till her shoulder, and her eyelids just blinking from side... he quickly looked away, as she had noticed him staring at her. 5 minutes passed by, but Pranav could not hold his desire to look at the beauty sitting next to her, he made an effort and tried having a glance with a mild effort... she caught him this time and smiled at him. Pranav smiled too, embarrassed a bit about being caught. Said "Hi" and she too said... "Hi I am Anshika". He answered "Pranav.. Pranav Ganeshan". She was doing her PHd in the Delhi University just next to Pranav's office, where Pranav had just got a Job in a World renowned bank and it was just his first week at work.
Days moved ahead, they met each other by chance 2-3 times a week, and then Pranav started timing his exit from office in such a way that he could meet Anshika. He liked talking to her, and gradually it became a practice for her to sit with him, and if there was no seat, Pranav would stand next to the seat and give his seat to her. She used to smile and sit down and then they used to talk all the way till her stop came....
They became good friends, started meeting for coffee and sometimes even met with each others friends. Pranav liked Anshika's love for reading and they discussed for long about Ayn Rand's and Paulo Cohelo's creations. They became close and loved each others company.
Pranav was promoted and company wanted to send him to a critical project in Chennai. In the boss's room from no where he was shocked to feel the thought of Anshika coming to his mind when he thought of leaving Delhi.
He told Anshika about promotion, and she jumped with joy.... she called all their common friends before even Pranav could tell them and they had a warm farewell... The last week in Delhi was tough for Pranav with the only thought of missing Anshika. She came to see him off and as the train started Pranav looked into her moist beautiful eyes and said..."I will miss you".. just then a drop fell from her eyes and she smiled and said..."I too"... and the train left the station with them waving towards each other. Pranav stood there till he could see Anshika in her yellow suit getting farther and farther....
He reached Chennai and ran to the PCO booth and called Anshika and told her that he had reached... she said she was checking the phone each moment waiting for his call and Pranav did not know why he just could not say to her anything... he was just listening to her as if he was absorbing Anshika's each voice... He said.... Missing you and cut the phone... the voice reciprocated...
Pranav was doing extremely well ... getting the best accolades of the department and after each of them he used to call her and she was happier than what Pranav thought she would be...
Days became months and 4-5 months passed. They spent every night after the hectic day half an hour listening to each other. Pranav never wanted to keep the phone and Anshika used to force him to keep as it used to get late.
He used to sleep with a smile on his face every night after calling her and the day after day he was coming to the realization that he loved Anshika.... He was sure that Anshika was just waiting for him to say it...
He couldn’t wait for the day when he got a week’s leave and he took a flight to Delhi.... he reached the Airport and Anshika was as usual the first one to be called. They met the same evening.
She was wearing a white Salwaar Kameez and Pranav felt as if she looked much more beautiful than when he had left her in Delhi... They both loved to meet at the lovely big football ground in Munirka rather than any coffee house...
He had bought a red rose for her en-route and thought that today he would tell her what he thought Anshika was also waiting to hear.
As they were sitting and looking at the children playing football... Pranav took courage and held her hand which was between them... Anshika felt the touch for the first time and got a bit straightened and looked at Pranav. He took the rose out of the packet he was hiding it in and gave Anshika... and said... “Anshika.... I..... I......... love you...”... She smiled, took the Rose in her hand and looked at it.... kept mum... he was confused, he was expecting something in return .. may be a line of “Love You too..” or some thing like that. He was silent and so was Anshika, who was now looking at the children playing football and was purposely not looking at Pranav, who was looking at her for an answer.
She slowly turned and looked at Pranav and said... “Pranav, I knew this would happen someday... but I always wanted to tell you that this cant work.. Yes I like you.. but I mean.. we can’t have a future I guess... I mean I am not sure... You are a nice guy, but somehow Pranav please understand.. I hope you will”.
Pranav did not know how to react. His heart skipped a beat.. he sat still for a moment and looked at the football which changed legs from once child to another... He took a breath and said.. “Hey its Ok.. we are good friends too.... and anyways.. you said may be you are not sure... may be you can take your time”.... Anshika hesitantly smiled and they both got up and started walking and she said “Thanks for the rose !!”.
Pranav reached home and the week just passed by. He did not want to meet Anshika, somehow he did not have the courage to look into her eyes.. he did not know what to speak to her.. what to talk to her.. Paulo Cohelo and Ayn Rand topics looked too artificial to him to talk with her.
So, the day before he left, he called Anshika to say bye and said her that he would miss her in Chennai, but Anshika was silent with no.. “Miss you too ...”
He sensed something... not knowing what was it.. he kept the phone and time passed by.
He called her everyday as usual but now the talks did not have the taste as they had before and he saw Anshika telling him on some days that she was sleepy and on some days that she had an exam... so even when Pranav wanted to get the topic that he was dying to talk about he was hesitant. Anshika’s response was not what it used to be before they had met the last time. He did not want to accept the fact that things had changed.... He wanted the same Anshika who was crazy to talk to him.. he wanted her to scold him if he missed calling her.. he wanted her to call him when she finished reading a new book to tell him how much she loved it... he started to look for the Anshika who was no more there in those talks... the search exhausted him... he was tired of saying the one sided “Miss yous..” when the other side just gave a “Hmm...” in response...
He started getting impatient and restless, alone in his apartment... Office started getting tasteless for him... his only mission in life now seemed to be Anshika.... He could not understand why he was getting crazier about her day by day and had started sensing a repulsion from Anshika’s end... His mind could not conclude what had gone wrong and Anshika became a pursuit for him rather than a person whom he loved... He just wanted her badly now... he just wanted her to say the “Miss yous” that she always said before keeping the phone... He wanted to hear the “Love You” that he was suffering to hear from...
Things had changed... he was coming to the reality gradually..... the love was no more there... he went twice to Delhi on leave in the year that just passed by, they even met but, he felt the hours with Anshika even difficult to spend than what it would be with a stranger.... On asking about their future, she just said that she did not think it was possible..
The relation lost its charm... the daily calls got shortened... and gradually moved to weekly and very soon vanished.... He was broken ... shattered.... alone in Chennai... lonely... dealing with his thoughts and fighting against each of them reminding him of her laugh... her eyes....
He suffered, but work kept him involved.. joined Yoga... time and distance too helped him to get out of it... made new friends at Chennai... and he started smiling again... happy once again with what life had for him... Anshika had turned into just a thought for him... though he loved her still and he hoped she knew it too.... he was not sure how she was and what her life was like. He did not want to keep any touch because he felt that he was no more needed in her life... He was not a person whom she wanted anymore in her life... The unanswered mails and calls had already hinted him this when he had realized that.
He was happy now... Present was looking fresh to him... once again he was excelling at work and was the Accolade man again... Yes.. he did not have Anshika to jump on his news anymore... but it was fine for him.. he did not miss her so much .. and was a winner again.
His ambition had taken him away from the past and he finally was moving to the Oxford in London for doing his Phd in Finance. He was busy shopping for the exciting career that was coming his way... The day finally came.... he had his flight at 8:00 PM so reached the Airport at 4:00.. He was at the immigration counter when his cell rang.... There was noise around him so he kept a hand on his one ear and said Hello... the other side said... “Hi Pranav” .. his heart skipped a beat... This was the voice that was not being heard by his ears but by his soul... This was the voice he could recognize even with thousand decibels of noise around him.... He took a deep breath and said.. “Hi Anshika.. How are you”... She said... “Hey going to London and didn’t even tell me”.. Pranav smiled and said... “Oh am sorry”.. he did not know what to speak to her ... was not sure whether he even wanted to talk to her... but Anshika was full of joy, as if they had just talked the day before and the two years were actually just two hours....
Pranav was like a cube of Sugar... he dissolved in Anshika’s sweet voice and forgot all that had gone through in the past.. All the suffering, all that agony that once had come his way were too small at this moment... He was talking to the same Anshika whom he had made himself to forget... and had succeeded too...
The rest 3 Hours in the Airport, Anshika talked to him till he sat in the flight... Pranav’s joy knew no bound.... He felt this as his happiest moment in life... he was on the Window seat and as the flight took off he could see Anshika in the clouds, in her white Salwaar Kameez waving bye at him.. The “Will Miss you” that Anshika had said just moments ago was still echoing in his ears....
With these thoughts he closed his eyes and suddenly he felt an urge to listen to the thought that was trying to pop up in his mind for the last 4-5 hours... He did not want to think about this question.... He was scared what the answer could be... he did not want to know the truth as he felt it could be bitter.... The question was.. “Why did Anshika come back..”
But the answers came popping in his mind.... “Did she come seeing my success...”... “ No she can’t be that mean...”... “After 2 Years did she miss me..or has she just come as a friend” ... “Did something in her life suddenly made her realize what I meant to her..”
He did not want to face these answers... he was happy.... and Anshika was back... he did not know as what.. but she was there with him today.. in the clouds .. in his mind... in him.. she was back...
He reached London Airport and immediately called her that he had reached safely... she was happy... and so was he...
He started calling her from London... and Anshika also got up even when half asleep, but talked to him... she again started sharing with him which book she read .. she again said .. “Miss yous..” when he called...
Pranav did not have the courage of asking Anshika ... why did she come back... he did not want to loose her again... he did not even want to know whether she loved him now... he just did not want to say anything that could mean Anshika leaving him again... But for him he was already in love with her again.. she was her each second once again...
She was same ... and so was he... they talked often now... and the joys were back...
One night while Pranav was just reading Anshika’s old mails... he came across the mail that she had written to him 3 Yrs before and had shared with him her mail-id and password so that he could see her score of PHd when she would be in her home town.
Pranav hesitantly opened the mail site and entered the mail id anshikao2@gmailTech.com and password Indo123 and there opened her mailbox... with so many mails. He hesitantly scrolled through the mail and found that most of the mails were from an email-id Alok.... he felt anxious and could not stop him from opening one of the mails... He saw the mail ending with... Love you... and then in the sent items saw Anshika’s mail box full of mails to Alok... he was surprised and started reading them at random.... as he read them he just could not stop and read each of them one by one....
One of them read... “Alok ... look how cute... Anshika Weds Alok looks ....”. the other had.... “Hey Alok... do you know how much I love you....”.... as he kept reading each of them he reached a point where he saw a mail from Alok in which he is trying to tell Anshika how difficult it is for him to get married to her and that it is better that they should end the relationship here.... The unpleasant messages between them had started about two months back according to the e-mail date.... the last one was just 2 days back.... but he could not conclude anything from the recent mails...
He did not realize that he was shivering for the last 1 hour since the time he started reading them .. he did not know what to do.... he was restless... he wanted to cry... wanted to scream.... did not know what to do... He was shocked.... a state of emotionlessness had enveloped him.... he laughed .. laughed and laughed... like a mad... he looked into the mirror... he was still trembling... looked at his image and kept laughing... and then slowly fainted on the floor in the loneliness of the flat..
He was lying there still for 5 hours and his eyes opened when the birds chirped with the break of the day... as he walked to his room he saw the laptop still open with Anshika’s mail box open in front of him...
He stared at the word "Alok"... he could no more run from the truth that he had never ever imagined... Anshika Loved some one else... In the years when he was living each second trying to wrestle with his thoughts in order to forget her, she was dreaming of life with someone else... She had never said.. “Pranav I love you..” but all her mails were full of “Alok .. Anshika loves you the most..”.. He wished the ground would crack and absorb him in.. he could not look into the mirror as he felt he can not even face the self...
He shut the laptop and had a shower.... still wondering... why was Anshika Back... or was she back at all....
He did not know what was it with Alok and Anshika now, but he felt terrible and wanted the shower to wash away each inch of Anshika in him... he wanted to wash away this name from his life... from his soul... the name that he had worshipped.... He asked himself if he was just a back up.. a substitute for Alok... if at all that was the reason why Anshika came back....
He asked himself under the shower... does he still want her heart which had loved or still loves someone else.... will he be able to kiss the lips which have kissed someone else... will he be able to accept her the way she is... he just wanted to stop thinking.... He wanted to hold each stream and drop of the flowing water on his body and rub it against his soul....
He wanted to cry.... cry like a baby...
....................................And all this thought got Pranav to the present as he was lying on his bed under the ceiling fan and the tears flowing out of the corner of his eyes.
He wanted to cry, cry loud, with the scream that could be heard in each corner of the world... a scream that would wake every sleeping soul in the world... a scream... which shall tear him apart.... May be it was just in this hope that he had come to see this movie, so that in the dark, the shock that he had got some days ago will melt in tears... and it did... he was feeling better with the exodus of the tears.
The streets were all empty and he walked lonely on them ..... and with each step a drop of tear was flowing down his cheek, timing the footsteps as if giving a music. He unlocked the apartment and fell on his bed looking at the ceiling, the fan was moving slowly with a small tick sound.... the moving fan took him slowly to the moment when he saw her for the first time ..........................................
It was bus number 348 on which he was sitting on the 4th seat alone, away from the window. There came someone who said "excuse me" and he moved his leg out of the seat giving her way. He just saw a blue Salwaar Kameez rubbing against the seat and getting seated next to him.... He was conscious of the lovely perfume smell she had, he just tried to see her from the corner of his eyes... black blunt hair till her shoulder, and her eyelids just blinking from side... he quickly looked away, as she had noticed him staring at her. 5 minutes passed by, but Pranav could not hold his desire to look at the beauty sitting next to her, he made an effort and tried having a glance with a mild effort... she caught him this time and smiled at him. Pranav smiled too, embarrassed a bit about being caught. Said "Hi" and she too said... "Hi I am Anshika". He answered "Pranav.. Pranav Ganeshan". She was doing her PHd in the Delhi University just next to Pranav's office, where Pranav had just got a Job in a World renowned bank and it was just his first week at work.
Days moved ahead, they met each other by chance 2-3 times a week, and then Pranav started timing his exit from office in such a way that he could meet Anshika. He liked talking to her, and gradually it became a practice for her to sit with him, and if there was no seat, Pranav would stand next to the seat and give his seat to her. She used to smile and sit down and then they used to talk all the way till her stop came....
They became good friends, started meeting for coffee and sometimes even met with each others friends. Pranav liked Anshika's love for reading and they discussed for long about Ayn Rand's and Paulo Cohelo's creations. They became close and loved each others company.
Pranav was promoted and company wanted to send him to a critical project in Chennai. In the boss's room from no where he was shocked to feel the thought of Anshika coming to his mind when he thought of leaving Delhi.
He told Anshika about promotion, and she jumped with joy.... she called all their common friends before even Pranav could tell them and they had a warm farewell... The last week in Delhi was tough for Pranav with the only thought of missing Anshika. She came to see him off and as the train started Pranav looked into her moist beautiful eyes and said..."I will miss you".. just then a drop fell from her eyes and she smiled and said..."I too"... and the train left the station with them waving towards each other. Pranav stood there till he could see Anshika in her yellow suit getting farther and farther....
He reached Chennai and ran to the PCO booth and called Anshika and told her that he had reached... she said she was checking the phone each moment waiting for his call and Pranav did not know why he just could not say to her anything... he was just listening to her as if he was absorbing Anshika's each voice... He said.... Missing you and cut the phone... the voice reciprocated...
Pranav was doing extremely well ... getting the best accolades of the department and after each of them he used to call her and she was happier than what Pranav thought she would be...
Days became months and 4-5 months passed. They spent every night after the hectic day half an hour listening to each other. Pranav never wanted to keep the phone and Anshika used to force him to keep as it used to get late.
He used to sleep with a smile on his face every night after calling her and the day after day he was coming to the realization that he loved Anshika.... He was sure that Anshika was just waiting for him to say it...
He couldn’t wait for the day when he got a week’s leave and he took a flight to Delhi.... he reached the Airport and Anshika was as usual the first one to be called. They met the same evening.
She was wearing a white Salwaar Kameez and Pranav felt as if she looked much more beautiful than when he had left her in Delhi... They both loved to meet at the lovely big football ground in Munirka rather than any coffee house...
He had bought a red rose for her en-route and thought that today he would tell her what he thought Anshika was also waiting to hear.
As they were sitting and looking at the children playing football... Pranav took courage and held her hand which was between them... Anshika felt the touch for the first time and got a bit straightened and looked at Pranav. He took the rose out of the packet he was hiding it in and gave Anshika... and said... “Anshika.... I..... I......... love you...”... She smiled, took the Rose in her hand and looked at it.... kept mum... he was confused, he was expecting something in return .. may be a line of “Love You too..” or some thing like that. He was silent and so was Anshika, who was now looking at the children playing football and was purposely not looking at Pranav, who was looking at her for an answer.
She slowly turned and looked at Pranav and said... “Pranav, I knew this would happen someday... but I always wanted to tell you that this cant work.. Yes I like you.. but I mean.. we can’t have a future I guess... I mean I am not sure... You are a nice guy, but somehow Pranav please understand.. I hope you will”.
Pranav did not know how to react. His heart skipped a beat.. he sat still for a moment and looked at the football which changed legs from once child to another... He took a breath and said.. “Hey its Ok.. we are good friends too.... and anyways.. you said may be you are not sure... may be you can take your time”.... Anshika hesitantly smiled and they both got up and started walking and she said “Thanks for the rose !!”.
Pranav reached home and the week just passed by. He did not want to meet Anshika, somehow he did not have the courage to look into her eyes.. he did not know what to speak to her.. what to talk to her.. Paulo Cohelo and Ayn Rand topics looked too artificial to him to talk with her.
So, the day before he left, he called Anshika to say bye and said her that he would miss her in Chennai, but Anshika was silent with no.. “Miss you too ...”
He sensed something... not knowing what was it.. he kept the phone and time passed by.
He called her everyday as usual but now the talks did not have the taste as they had before and he saw Anshika telling him on some days that she was sleepy and on some days that she had an exam... so even when Pranav wanted to get the topic that he was dying to talk about he was hesitant. Anshika’s response was not what it used to be before they had met the last time. He did not want to accept the fact that things had changed.... He wanted the same Anshika who was crazy to talk to him.. he wanted her to scold him if he missed calling her.. he wanted her to call him when she finished reading a new book to tell him how much she loved it... he started to look for the Anshika who was no more there in those talks... the search exhausted him... he was tired of saying the one sided “Miss yous..” when the other side just gave a “Hmm...” in response...
He started getting impatient and restless, alone in his apartment... Office started getting tasteless for him... his only mission in life now seemed to be Anshika.... He could not understand why he was getting crazier about her day by day and had started sensing a repulsion from Anshika’s end... His mind could not conclude what had gone wrong and Anshika became a pursuit for him rather than a person whom he loved... He just wanted her badly now... he just wanted her to say the “Miss yous” that she always said before keeping the phone... He wanted to hear the “Love You” that he was suffering to hear from...
Things had changed... he was coming to the reality gradually..... the love was no more there... he went twice to Delhi on leave in the year that just passed by, they even met but, he felt the hours with Anshika even difficult to spend than what it would be with a stranger.... On asking about their future, she just said that she did not think it was possible..
The relation lost its charm... the daily calls got shortened... and gradually moved to weekly and very soon vanished.... He was broken ... shattered.... alone in Chennai... lonely... dealing with his thoughts and fighting against each of them reminding him of her laugh... her eyes....
He suffered, but work kept him involved.. joined Yoga... time and distance too helped him to get out of it... made new friends at Chennai... and he started smiling again... happy once again with what life had for him... Anshika had turned into just a thought for him... though he loved her still and he hoped she knew it too.... he was not sure how she was and what her life was like. He did not want to keep any touch because he felt that he was no more needed in her life... He was not a person whom she wanted anymore in her life... The unanswered mails and calls had already hinted him this when he had realized that.
He was happy now... Present was looking fresh to him... once again he was excelling at work and was the Accolade man again... Yes.. he did not have Anshika to jump on his news anymore... but it was fine for him.. he did not miss her so much .. and was a winner again.
His ambition had taken him away from the past and he finally was moving to the Oxford in London for doing his Phd in Finance. He was busy shopping for the exciting career that was coming his way... The day finally came.... he had his flight at 8:00 PM so reached the Airport at 4:00.. He was at the immigration counter when his cell rang.... There was noise around him so he kept a hand on his one ear and said Hello... the other side said... “Hi Pranav” .. his heart skipped a beat... This was the voice that was not being heard by his ears but by his soul... This was the voice he could recognize even with thousand decibels of noise around him.... He took a deep breath and said.. “Hi Anshika.. How are you”... She said... “Hey going to London and didn’t even tell me”.. Pranav smiled and said... “Oh am sorry”.. he did not know what to speak to her ... was not sure whether he even wanted to talk to her... but Anshika was full of joy, as if they had just talked the day before and the two years were actually just two hours....
Pranav was like a cube of Sugar... he dissolved in Anshika’s sweet voice and forgot all that had gone through in the past.. All the suffering, all that agony that once had come his way were too small at this moment... He was talking to the same Anshika whom he had made himself to forget... and had succeeded too...
The rest 3 Hours in the Airport, Anshika talked to him till he sat in the flight... Pranav’s joy knew no bound.... He felt this as his happiest moment in life... he was on the Window seat and as the flight took off he could see Anshika in the clouds, in her white Salwaar Kameez waving bye at him.. The “Will Miss you” that Anshika had said just moments ago was still echoing in his ears....
With these thoughts he closed his eyes and suddenly he felt an urge to listen to the thought that was trying to pop up in his mind for the last 4-5 hours... He did not want to think about this question.... He was scared what the answer could be... he did not want to know the truth as he felt it could be bitter.... The question was.. “Why did Anshika come back..”
But the answers came popping in his mind.... “Did she come seeing my success...”... “ No she can’t be that mean...”... “After 2 Years did she miss me..or has she just come as a friend” ... “Did something in her life suddenly made her realize what I meant to her..”
He did not want to face these answers... he was happy.... and Anshika was back... he did not know as what.. but she was there with him today.. in the clouds .. in his mind... in him.. she was back...
He reached London Airport and immediately called her that he had reached safely... she was happy... and so was he...
He started calling her from London... and Anshika also got up even when half asleep, but talked to him... she again started sharing with him which book she read .. she again said .. “Miss yous..” when he called...
Pranav did not have the courage of asking Anshika ... why did she come back... he did not want to loose her again... he did not even want to know whether she loved him now... he just did not want to say anything that could mean Anshika leaving him again... But for him he was already in love with her again.. she was her each second once again...
She was same ... and so was he... they talked often now... and the joys were back...
One night while Pranav was just reading Anshika’s old mails... he came across the mail that she had written to him 3 Yrs before and had shared with him her mail-id and password so that he could see her score of PHd when she would be in her home town.
Pranav hesitantly opened the mail site and entered the mail id anshikao2@gmailTech.com and password Indo123 and there opened her mailbox... with so many mails. He hesitantly scrolled through the mail and found that most of the mails were from an email-id Alok.... he felt anxious and could not stop him from opening one of the mails... He saw the mail ending with... Love you... and then in the sent items saw Anshika’s mail box full of mails to Alok... he was surprised and started reading them at random.... as he read them he just could not stop and read each of them one by one....
One of them read... “Alok ... look how cute... Anshika Weds Alok looks ....”. the other had.... “Hey Alok... do you know how much I love you....”.... as he kept reading each of them he reached a point where he saw a mail from Alok in which he is trying to tell Anshika how difficult it is for him to get married to her and that it is better that they should end the relationship here.... The unpleasant messages between them had started about two months back according to the e-mail date.... the last one was just 2 days back.... but he could not conclude anything from the recent mails...
He did not realize that he was shivering for the last 1 hour since the time he started reading them .. he did not know what to do.... he was restless... he wanted to cry... wanted to scream.... did not know what to do... He was shocked.... a state of emotionlessness had enveloped him.... he laughed .. laughed and laughed... like a mad... he looked into the mirror... he was still trembling... looked at his image and kept laughing... and then slowly fainted on the floor in the loneliness of the flat..
He was lying there still for 5 hours and his eyes opened when the birds chirped with the break of the day... as he walked to his room he saw the laptop still open with Anshika’s mail box open in front of him...
He stared at the word "Alok"... he could no more run from the truth that he had never ever imagined... Anshika Loved some one else... In the years when he was living each second trying to wrestle with his thoughts in order to forget her, she was dreaming of life with someone else... She had never said.. “Pranav I love you..” but all her mails were full of “Alok .. Anshika loves you the most..”.. He wished the ground would crack and absorb him in.. he could not look into the mirror as he felt he can not even face the self...
He shut the laptop and had a shower.... still wondering... why was Anshika Back... or was she back at all....
He did not know what was it with Alok and Anshika now, but he felt terrible and wanted the shower to wash away each inch of Anshika in him... he wanted to wash away this name from his life... from his soul... the name that he had worshipped.... He asked himself if he was just a back up.. a substitute for Alok... if at all that was the reason why Anshika came back....
He asked himself under the shower... does he still want her heart which had loved or still loves someone else.... will he be able to kiss the lips which have kissed someone else... will he be able to accept her the way she is... he just wanted to stop thinking.... He wanted to hold each stream and drop of the flowing water on his body and rub it against his soul....
He wanted to cry.... cry like a baby...
....................................And all this thought got Pranav to the present as he was lying on his bed under the ceiling fan and the tears flowing out of the corner of his eyes.
Just then he heard his mobile ringing.... as he picked it and saw.... a drop of tear fell on the mobile's screen which showed... "Anshika Calling".......
11 comments:
nice story line...
Excellent work on expressing all the emotions that such a relationship can have.
Few points whihc i felt could be looked into in furture stories..
1.Pranav was working into world renowed bank, I felt it is anachronistic to expect him to go by train when he got transferred.Seeing off somebody seems more filmy..
2.These days everybody has got cellphones..guy would use cell phone rather than pco.
Praveen,
Don'take these points as criticism.
You have full rights to portray your charcters as you want to..
May be for me..it becomes highly difficult to digest stories which include scenes such as shahrukh on a rickshaw chasing a car.
Good luck!!
Hahaha Anshuman,
1) I was myself wondering about the fact that should he have a cellphone.... but may be considering the fact that it would mean him being in touch with Anshika through out the journey. I wanted him to miss her in the journey, an call her once he reaches Chennai :)
Well.. I really appreciate this thought... but Anshuman truely speaking the seing off scene is not filmy... Moist eyes are a regular scene when one sees off.. the eyes may differ.. from Mother's to the beloved...
2) And hey... I wanted to project his growth by showing how he moved from Bus and Train to flight :)
Please keep pouring your comments, I would always take it as positive !!
Thanks,
-Praveen
Definitely a good portrayal of emotions dude.I felt slightly confused about coming back of Anishka, i think it needs some explanantion otherwise she becomes a little bit of a vamp and gets all the bad names (:-)however take your pic,keep writing,good read!!
Yup..Tushar
I too know that on Anshika's part there are some questions unanswered. Yes, may be some where it may make different readers to deduce differently about her role.
Well, I guess this may not be the end... Pranav might find the answers to his questions, and then may be the story will conclude or continue better.
Am still thinking of how to take the story ahead :)
Till then.... take care !!
-Praveen
hmmmm..wat to say buddy..!!!
Tushar,
Thinking over a bit more.. of course Anshika is no vamp or any negative character here....
Only that she lacks the reciprocation for Pranav...
That could not be a reason to malign her... so that is of course not the intent... and not the case..
Yes there is a foggy picture, which is because its written more from the vantage point of Pranav.
Anyways... take care !!
-Praveen
Hey Deepa,
Good you read :)
You dont have to say anything buddy... just read ;0
heheh
Take care,
-Praveen
hi GKJ
have read ur mini novel....
truly a gud piece of work esp wrt expressing the human emotion... they way u described personal appearance of anshika further strenghten my belief in ur writing talent... Do keep it up dude....
cheers
Pranav and Anshika
Thanks Hemant/Parag !!
Not sure who else could call me GKJ.. Lol
Well... I still feel it is incomplete... will complete it when I get time...
Good one Sahu ...keep the good work up ...
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